How to overcome fear quickly.

What fear! Whom to fear! Steel your hearts and set yourselves to work!

- Swami Vivekananda

I have come across many people in my life who regret some step is not taken by them in the past. They say that they didn't take the step because of fear. They regret it because now they think if the step would have taken at that time, the situation would not be

worst. I advise them to forget about the past and move ahead because what is gone is the past now. It will not come back. But they can fix their present to have a better future. Many of us have done this in their life because of some reason in the past. We often say I couldn't do it because of the circumstance, because of the time, etc, etc. I have also done it in the past and paid for it but then I promised myself that when I can enjoy my happy moments of life why can't I enjoy the bad time too. We enjoy our happiness to the full but when our bad time comes, we lose all hopes and give up quickly. 

Few people let fear rule them so badly that they end their life without realizing that what will happen to the rest of the family. It's really bad. I have a habit of breaking down things into smaller parts to get the best out of them. I invented this meaning of fear which is:

F - Face 

E - Every

A - Awkward moment

R - Responsibly

I will describe them briefly. To make it more clear, I will share a story with you all. Please read it because it will give you a better understanding to overcome fear. 

There is one friend of mine who was working in a big MNC in a very good position. In the last year 2020, his company got into a huge loss because of Covid-19, and many employees were asked to leave. He was doing good. But suddenly, the bad time knocked at his door. He lost his job. Now initially, he was fine as he thought things will become normal. But it didn't work. The month passed and there was no job for him in the market. He started getting depressed. A multi-talented person was dead now. He lost all the hopes and become frustrated. He was applying for all types of jobs and was ready to compromise on his salary and designation too. But unfortunately, nothing was working in a positive direction. He got scared more when he got to know that his father's health is not going well as he was an aged person. His wife was working but with one person's salary, things were not going smooth. He decided to commit suicide also once but then realized that it will be a foolish step in his life. One day he was talking to me over the phone. He cried like a kid and I got the hint that things are not going in the right direction. From my experience, I decided to take him out of this situation.

I am not beating my own trumpet here, but as a true friend, I moved further. I called him to meet me. He came to meet me. I was shocked to see his condition. He was looking so sick that was beyond my expectation. All he kept on saying I don't know why God is upset with me? Why me? Why me? It was a simple question that is this the end of his life? How many times he has remembered God when he enjoyed or celebrated his success. He was speechless now. I told him to tell me what he does the entire day since he has been staying at home. He replied that he cooks, he drives to pick and drop her wife from her office. He does gardening and he plays guitar but that can't help him. I told him that pick up one task that he can do without any hassle. He said cooking. I asked him to relax now. He gave me a strange look as if he was laughing at me thinking that what type of person is Moloy?

Then I explained to him that nothing is permanent. Your good time came and you enjoyed it to the fullest. Now it's your bad time. So enjoy it. Face it. He couldn't understand it in the first go but then he understood when I gave him a way out. I told him to convert his passion for cooking into a business. He was not getting any clue. I told him that he is applying for jobs regularly but nothing is happening. Get involved in some activity and try to find out ways to get income from it. I advised him to start cooking. Many people are unable to go out and eat. It will help them out and he will get a business opportunity. Lastly, I told him if you'll let fear overpower him, it will for sure, and things will become more worst for him. He went back to his home and called me the next day asking that how he should start it. I told him the ways to promote his business and start at a small level which he can handle without any issue. Also, I told him to ignore other's comments that will come his way for sure. He started and got a small amount in a week with his extensive promotion on social media and VOC (Voice of the customer). He called me and said he would have to do more. I told him that he has all the time to do it as he is not working anywhere. Instead, he is working on his own now.

Believe me, friends I was really happy after listening to a happy person. He worked hard and soon he got a job also. But he continued with his business also as he hired a guy who was looking for a job. I met him last month only when he asked me how come he never knew it which I asked him to do. 

I gave him the reason for it. I said he got so scared with this situation that he couldn't handle this bad phase with responsibility. 

There is a famous dialogue from the super hit movie Sholay and the meaning says "You are dead if you are scared."

Yes, my friends, we face all good times and we take responsibility for it too. But we fall back the moment something bad happens to us. We lose hopes and we stop trying because we become restless. But we forget that Fear itself says, Face every awkward moment responsibly. We should never forget that Sun will rise again tomorrow. If there is a day in India there would be night in some other country.

Everything has two sides to it. Even the coin has a head and tail. The same applies to our life. Fear is just a word. If you'll break it down you will come out of it soon. If not, then you'll never, and later you'll regret that wish I would do that.

 

I am not God and I don't have any supernatural powers to change the thing in a fraction of a second. I need to accept the truth. In our bad times, we should accept that the bad time is there. Having said that doesn't mean we'll give up. We should also enjoy this moment but we should be responsible enough to find out ways to overcome this phase. This is where fear comes that what will happen tomorrow? How would I survive? How would things go? If we Face every awkward moment responsibly, believe me, we would come out of it easy. 

So next time, if you ever surrounded by a bad phase and you have the fear that what will happen next, always remember

"Fear itself says you will overcome me only if you Face Every Awkward moment Responsibly."

All the best!

Regards,
Moloy  

(To read in Hindi, click here)